God will not abandon us

I've been reading this book Unshaken by Dan Wooley, which I highly recommend. I am about 27 chapters into it. It is based on a true story about a Compassion worker that was trapped under the rubble of the Hotel Montana in Port au Prince when the earthquake hit this past year. It's interesting because the way to book is written, it switches back and forth between Dan's struggle to survive under the rubble in Haiti, and the falling apart of his marriage due to his wife Christy's depression. In both stories, he shows us that although God may seem silent, distant, or missing all together - God never abandons us. Dan Wooley experiences God's presence in overwhelming ways throughout his story, and challenges us to not give up and keep seeking God no matter what the circumstances may be.

During the past few years I have had times where I wanted to end my life. I had lost a lot of weight due to my anxiety and depression. I wasn't eating. I was down to 105 lbs, and had checked myself into a hospital to get help before all was lost. It was exactly the way Dan describes it in his book. Everything seemed hopeless. God was distant at times, but then God would remind me to keep seeking him. And he began to show up in the most unique ways. People would randomly approach me at work to tell me they are praying for me. They didn't know anything about me, they just felt led to come to me and say a prayer with me in the middle of the Kroger produce department. I would struggle with my thoughts, horrifying and demonic at times, and God would work through different people to give me hope and encouragement. At one point a local high school student who I had never met before came up to me and started to pray in the name of Jesus. He then went on to tell me everything about myself. He knew the issues that I was dealing with, the thoughts that I couldn't get rid of, every specific detail about my life. He told me not to worry, that God told him to let me know that he loved me and would never abandon me. After he finished praying and talking to me, he gave me a huge hug, said "God loves you bro" and walked off. All of these experiences make me wonder why I doubt sometimes.

...And then I turned to the book of Isaiah 4:2-6 and thought to myself "Whenever we face difficult times it's easy for us to think that God has abandoned us." We shouldn't think of good health, security, and pleasure as the end goal. We should focus on God's character and know that he will take care of us and that he is all that we need. God seeks our good in everything, even when everything seems hopeless and lost. Looking back at my experiences over the past few years,  I'm just reminded of how true this is. Sometimes it takes time to see how God is working in our lives. Sometimes we have to back up and look at it from a different angle. All I know is that if you want to experience God at work in your life, keep seeking him and he will meet you where you are.